Who’s Stirring S- -t In Downunderland?

Posted on March 13, 2011 by patriciawa

Exitement in Downunderland!
I’m reading news just come to hand.
Mr. Rabbit’s made a declaration
Which calls for unity as ‘one nation,’
Swears he’ll serve us with devotion.
To that end he’ll move a motion,
Promising an apology
For all his past scatology.
We doubt that much will come of it
We’ve heard before the same bullshit.
He is not a man who keeps his word,
Valued less than a rotting turd.
His known foul views and policies
On how to run democracies
Echo those of extreme dissent,
His rivals in such excrement.
One, a redhead, he got sent to gaol.
Not our Red Queen!  That move would fail.
She’s too smart. He’ll never beat her.
His ‘one nation’ talk is crap!   Excreta!

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“Charity Begins At Home.”

Posted on March 12, 2011 by patriciawa

Yes, “Charity begins at home.”
That is what Tony Abbott said.
Is this taught by the Church of Rome?
This the word that Christians spread?

Australians who need a latté,
Have credit cards that must be paid,
Who buy wine and fois gras paté,
Matter more than overseas aid?

We hear in shadow cabinet
He proposed as a general rule
These ‘needs’ are ones that must be met,
Before a hungry ‘foreign’ child or school.

That’s the ‘fat’ that Abbott’s carving
From Budget plans so there’s no levy?
Taking food from the poor and starving
So tax ‘at home’ is not so heavy?

Where’s the ‘charity’ in tax relief?
Is there no Bible on Abbott’s bookshelf?
Does he not share in Christ’s belief
That one should love one’s neighbour as oneself?

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Stress & Strine For Orstraylia In These Testing Times!

Posted on March 12, 2011 by patriciawa

You say our Julia is to blame.
She’s why Oz has lost the Ashes.
You commentators! You’re all the same.
Looking for those headline splashes.

Surely there’s a more obvious name,
Why doesn’t someone grab it?
The cause of all our national shame
Is that rotten Mr. Rabbit.

He says he loves our national game,
But John Howard’s former magic
Won’t strengthen this, his new heir’s claim,
That he too’s a cricket tragic.

They know he finds it all too tame
Beside a field of grass or clover,
He thinks the play is pretty lame
Till someone bowls a maiden over.

Then he wakes up, right in the frame,
Hears those words – ‘a wicket maiden’ –
And he’ll applaud. Then he’ll exclaim
To Oz batsmen, “Great! That slayed ‘em!”

Truly, his one and only aim,
Employing terms like ‘spin’ and ‘sledge’
Is trying to run out that dame.
For that he’d look for any edge.

No wonder that our national game
Isn’t going well for Aussies.
Rabbit? That’s a hopeless player’s name!
Where are his whites?  What’s with the cozzies?

The PM though, red hair aflame
Really does look great in white.
The public greet her with acclaim.
Wearing those pants, she’s quite a sight.

Mr. Rabbit’s just not worth the time.
Send him off! Back into his hutch.
Let’s hear “Howzat!’ and “Play the gayme!”
Called by Julia.   She’s got the winning touch.

 

COMMENTS:

Miglo,  January 5, 2011  Pure magic, Patricia. Thank you again for sharing your wonderful verse with us.

Hillbilly Skeleton,    January 5. 2011     Patricia WA, They printed your poem on the John Birmingham blog! And so they should have. It was great. I hope Mr Birmingham noticed that the PM was at the SCG today for Jane McGrath Day. Much more important time to be at the cricket for a woman PM.

Janice,   January 5th, 201,   I’ve probably told you before that I enjoy your verse but your latest effort above prompts me to do so again. Thank you.

BillR,    January 05, 2011,    Thanks for the laugh

Gillian,    January 6th 2011,     Fabulous Mum ! xxxxx

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Julie Bishop’s New Career

Posted on March 12, 2011 by patriciawa

Julie Bishop seems born to be
A latter day Mata Hari.
She’s in the wrong vocation
In that Canberra location.
Just look at those eyes!
Someone should advise
Her to don the burqa,
Become an undercover worker.

Yes! She could go to Israel.
There surely she wouldn’t fail
To find herself the ideal job
Working with the Mossad mob.
They’re always looking out for spies
To work undercover in disguise.
It helps, of course, if they have brought
Along with them an Oz passport.

They might use her in Afghanistan
More likely though in Pakistan.
There the unspeakable Osama,
Posing as a quasi Dalai Lama,
Is plotting Judaism’s demise
With every evil plan he can devise.
He is hiding there in caves
With followers he treats like slaves.

Although Julie is Caucasian,
Her Aussie tan looks somewhat Asian.
Once the camp is infiltrated
She’d have Osama captivated.
Her piercing glances from those eyes
Could a whole army mesmerize.
No need for lewd or crude undress,
She’d weave her spell with real finesse.

Yes! Could be that Julie Bishop’s legendary eyes
Will achieve at last for her that glittering prize
Of happiness! Leaving behind a life of Coalition lies
She could dwell behind the veil, where eyes are valued more than thighs.

 

COMMENTS:

Talk Turkey,     22/12/10,      Saw your pome, thank Dog someone’s still keeping the Sword sharp. JB in a Burqa, Lethal Weapon! Poor Bette Davis would’ve died leg in air if she’d been fixed by Death Stare Woman eh!

Ad Astra,     22/12/10,      I’m glad restoring ‘comments’ has allowed you to treat us to another of your clever verses. We won’t ever forget what Julie’s stare did to the gnome on The Chasers, or whatever it was called at the time.

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Does Julian Assange Really Believe He Should Publish And Be Damned?

Posted on March 12, 2011 by patriciawa

So, has Julian Assange
Began to understand
How ‘freedom of the press’
Is now licence to oppress?
News Limited’s “The Times”
Is exploiting his crimes
As an alleged ‘raper.’
With every other paper
They own. Those juicy bits
Will get millions of hits;
Does his Wikileaks fame
Give protection from shame?
Will what’s considered a crime
Not be thought one this time?
Is he really at fault
In this case of assault?
Can the Swedish vice squad
Nab this man who played God?
Any hopes for his story
To be headlined with glory
By the heir of his hero,
Sir Keith, would be zero,
Except Rupert wants blood
From Obama and Rudd
In his media war
On all they stand for.
Assange should be wishing
The dirt he’s been dishing
Was leaked – not from a democracy
But from the dark heart of Murdochracy.

COMMENTS

nasking, 09/12/10, patriciawa, I understand yer concerns but I’m not as worried. I reckon Murdoch the Opportunist & Howard the Bush licker will have their hands bitten soon enuff. Smiles & smirks can vanish pretty quickly these days. Labor just needs to tough it out…and remember who is really givin’ them the hardest time. Payback. Great poem BTW.

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An Aussie Lad (2) Apologies To A.E.H

Posted on March 12, 2011 by patriciawa

When from Mal to Tony preference turned
The Libs were in much pain.
Now north to south, no longer spurned,
They’re feeling strong again.

Look left, look right, their future’s bright,
As if no loss there’d been.
Tony will win next time, then plight
Our troth to the English Queen.

“God save the Queen” he’ll have us sing,
Our national song not heard.
Even William could be our king,
Now he’s marrying that bird.

And when the flames of climate change
Burn Australian bush and sod,
Remember Catholic friends of his
Will intercede with God.

Good girls who know their place a’right,
Whose mothers taught them brave,
Will wait until their wedding night
To do that thing all crave.

They’ll have sons like their fathers got;
Men like him, inspiring awe
When bronzed and bared for photo shot,
Muscular, without a flaw.

Forget those doubts on policy.
That’s a job for anyone.
Or if the party can’t agree,
He can do it, on the run.

NormanK December 8. 2010 Points awarded for sucking me in. I thought you’d been kidnapped by aliens but by the time I’d rustled up a posse the ship had landed and chucked you out. Thank-you for that poem and please take it as read how much I appreciate all of your poems. They really are wonderful.

Nasking December 10, 2010 Enjoyed yer poem Patricia. As ever.

MY NOTE First version of this was written 18/01/10 as a spoof on Houseman’s ‘Shropshire Lad’ for the Lavartus Prodeo political satire competition, “In the Loop.”   Tony Abbott was a very new Opposition Leader who had very recently grabbed the job from Malcolm Turnbull by one vote. So my last verse, intended to be tongue in cheek, now looks somewhat prophetic!

Policies can change, fear not!
We’ll be again the men we’ve been.
The party now in Tony’s got
A leader like you’ve never seen!

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Abbott, Man Of Many Parts, And Slogans Too!

Posted on March 12, 2011 by patriciawa

Newspoll has Abbott in a hole
Compared with Gillard in her role.
His PR team sometimes despair,
They weep and wail and tear their hair.
Are the public confused,  they ask,
Facing a Herculean task,
Reshaping the information
About this man who’ll – ‘Save The Nation!’
Please don’t think these guys are bogans
Just because they think in slogans.
You try changing –  ‘He loves to surf!’
To –  ‘He is a great friend of the earth!’
Can you avoid that – ‘Loves his guns!’
Focus instead on – ‘This guy runs!’
They’ll film him on his racing bike,
Carrying mail to foil a postie strike.
Or even with his fireman’s axe.
‘Here’s the man to cut Labor’s tax!’
Or is that trite, a bit old hat.
Anyway, it’s too wet this year for that.
Now, there’s a thought!  With all this rain
He can take off his shirt again!
The idea of  ‘Abbott, Iron Man!’
Reluctantly they’ve had to ban.
‘Cos when mention of that is made,  he
Hates to hear,  ‘Gillard, Iron Lady!’
Still,  promoting the ‘ Great Go-getter!’
They’ll make much of that,  you betcha!
Whatever they decide he’ll be,
He’ll go along with it, you’ll see.
He’ll ‘run’ for the next election
From a fresh, ‘new direction.’
They’ll find another catchy phrase
For him to say, or sing his praise.
Watch!  Abbott, with PROs like these,
Could use longer words like – ‘Kinder, Gentler Policies!’

COMMENTS:

jane,     06/12/10,      Perhaps Tony might try longer words in his slogans – or use more than three or four!  Patricia, perhaps that’s his entire vocabulary! Lol.

Pip,     06/12/10,    Patricia, as usual entertains us and gives food for thought with every line.

Nasking,       06/12/10,     Spot on Patricia! Great poem!

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PJK – the ‘sweetest’ PM of all!

Posted on March 12, 2011 by patriciawa

Just been watching Lateline.
Wasn’t Keating fine!
Made me pine
For ‘auld lang syne.’
Old PJK!
I have to say
That in my day
He was Okay.
He loved Anita.
No one sweeter
About his love.
That I do recall
About young Paul.
He gave us all
In 1993
So gloriously
Another spell of sanity.
Then ten Howard years
Of war and tears
And workers’ fears.
Time with Kevin was peculiar
Now, thank God, there’s Julia.
And none of them at all
Can match young Paul.
He had his day,
Yet still has much to say.
As he’s just had,
On Labor’s golden lads.
Well, red haired lassie,
He seems to think is classy.
This is their sweet hour.
Now they have the power
To use for all of us.
Use it well we trust,
Before they turn to dust.
Like PJK?
Well, one day,
I guess, he must.

COMMENTS

Nasking,  04/12/10/  Know where yer comin’ from Patricia. I really miss him as a top politician. I’ll drink a beer tonite for him…and for you & yer poems. I luvs ’em. I used to write a lot of poems on Road to Surfdom back in 06-08 to get my point across…so it’s nice to see yer talent used so imaginatively & expressin’ how many of us feel.

Stafford-Ray, 13/07/11 How to vote!

“Gillard and Labor’s hit squad,
Left a gap without Rudd, the poor sod.
So put in that vacuum
Our Cath-o-lic backroom.
Vote Abbott and Bishop, get Pell, Pope and God!

PJK! Those were the days!!”

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Tony Abbott’s Toxic Talk

Posted on March 12, 2011 by patriciawa

When Abbott talks of ‘toxic’ infection,
The shrinks would say that’s just projection
Of his own, dark, inner reflection.
Gillard, guilty of lies, deception?
No!  He’s the one who needs correction!
So clearly lacking circumspection
In his manic drive to win election,
Spewing bile in every direction!
In some psychiatrists’ perception
He’d be an ideal candidate – for section.

NOTES

I did a re-write of this on 25/04/13 for Truth Seekers excellent post on Tony Abbott and the Truth About Lies where he says everything I would have liked to say here about Abbott’s lies and more of course since he has continued lying day in day out these past three years, hoping to lie his way into office.

Gillard guilty of dishonesty, deception?
Shrinks would say that’s Abbott’s projection
Of his own, dark, inner reflection.
He’s the one who needs correction!
In his manic drive to win election
He’s spewing lies in every direction!
In some psychiatrists’ perception
He’d be an ideal candidate – for section.

COMMENTS

Zorronsky, November 30, 2010 Yeah Patricia!

Nasking, 30/11/2010 LOL. So apt Patricia. You’ve done it again. S’ & I were watchin’ Abbott blow off steam in parliament yesterday & thought similar. He can be quite a loop sometimes. I imagine he gets so hot-headed the hair sizzles.

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Julia Gillard, In Her Prime?

Posted on March 12, 2011 by patriciawa

“Julia Gillard, in her prime,  pulls a career-defining rabbit out of the hat…” says Peter Hartcher of the Sydney Morning Herald.

Julia Gillard now ‘in her prime?’
You just don’t know how high she’ll climb!
She’ll reach heights even more sublime.
Don’t judge until she’s done her time.

This moment ‘career defining?’
She’s long been Labor’s silver lining!
That’s why News is always whining,
‘Bring her down!’   ‘Get her resigning!’

Pulled ‘a rabbit out of the hat?’
I’m not sure I’d agree with that!
She’s swatted Mr. Rabbit ‘SPLAT!’
Put him back in his box, real flat!

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